Tag Archive: this is weird

Continuity Theory

Photo courtesy of BigBangTheory.wikia.com.

Ever since I was little, I’ve been something of a linguaphile. My sister and I used to regard English to Anything dictionaries as a kind of Grimoirie, spending hours poring over them and hoping to glean the new and wonderful ability to speak a foreign language. In this way, I flirted with a variety of natural and devised languages, including Spanish, Latin, Greek, Quenya and Klingon.

I had never learned a substantial amount of Klingon, probably because my linguistic affairs were so numerous at the time. But for some reason, I took to one phrase in particular:

Cho magh. Qa qaw’.

You betray me. I destroy you.

This was easily over ten years ago.

Yesterday, I was watching TV with my husband when a trailer for Thor: The Dark World came on. I watched, to my surprise and delight, as Thor uttered the words to Loki, “If you betray me, I will kill you.”

Immediately, I said, spurred by the forces of destiny, “Cho magh. Qa qaw’.”

Immediately my husband, spurred by mild alarm, said, “What?”

Looking back, it probably required some backstory.

I sat there for a moment, smiling at the sheer perfection of that occurrence. There was one phrase I had learned in Klingon. Only one. And here, over ten years later, I was able to translate straight off the screen to that one short utterance that I had engraved on my very soul.

Suddenly, my life just felt meaningful.

I moved slowly, as if in a dream. “I have to… call my sister,” I said.

She was the only one who could understand.


Hot Men Are People, Too


Okay, so I haven’t been so diligent in my determination to blog every day.  I admit that.  But as you can see by the Wolverine post, quality suffers when you blog to blob.  But I’m hoping that there’s a mysterious wall that I can break through, like you put 100 crappy posts up and then everything that you write for the rest of your life is amazing.  So I am redetermining to hit my goal in February.
So just wanted to say:

Yesterday, at work, I saw one of the most gorgeous guys that I have EVER seen in my life.  He made most male models and movie stars look like homeless people.  He was tall, well-dressed, olive toned skin, perfect hair— come to think of it, he looked just like the love interest from my novel.  So glad that I didn’t think of that last night— I almost certainly would have said it.

So, he orders a beer and gets up to use the restroom.  We were fixing something in the men’s room, so he had to use the ladies’ room.  I was anxiously waiting to use the restroom myself, due to my new determination to drink eight glasses of water while I work.  So after a few minutes, he came out, and I waited what seemed like an appropriate, yet entirely  unreasonable length of time before rushing in.

The smell in that bathroom was unfathomable, and as I opened the door, it rushed out and greeted my nostrils with a cheerful aggression, not entirely unlike a department store salesperson.  I couldn’t do anything but laugh, which I quickly decided against, so as not to give the smell another way to invade my senses.

The guy was still hot when I left the bathroom, but decidedly more human, and I felt that I suddenly knew what it was like to be married to him.  Needless to say, all the fantasy of having him sweep me away on a white horse rapidly dissapated, especially when I considered the inherent olfactory truth of this daydream.

All this being said, I have a new appreciation for regular, slightly-above-average looking me.  I may not be wickedly hot, but I have never blown up a public restroom like that.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia.org.