Tag Archive: goals


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First of all, I am so proud of you. You have never been the kind of person to fit into the crowd. You have always done what you wanted to do, spoken your mind, and while the people around you may not necessarily have appreciated it, you will provide an inspiration to many many people just by continuing to be who you are.

I think that it’s only fair to warn you that the next ten years will not be easy ones, and that you will be blindsided by challenges that you never expected to face so soon in life. I want you to smile and face them anyway. Continue to look ahead with that characteristic wit, optimism and sense of humor that you have right now. Don’t allow yourself to give in to cynicism.

Above all else, chase your dreams and keep your family close. Spend your time and your money on experiences that matter and people who love you as much as you love them. And remember, you are who you are and things are the way they are for a reason. One day, all of that will be so clear. (It hasn’t happened yet, but it’s getting clearer all the time).

Love yourself for all that you are and all that you’re not and more importantly, everything that you have the potential to be.

Oh, and just go ahead and get your GED already- high school really wasn’t worth it.

PS: Your fiancé proposes to you at an anime themed burlesque show, and you both are cosplaying. Sweet deal, right?!

Five Guidelines for the New Year

Happy 2012!!!!

So, I wanted to kick off this year on a high note by chronicling some of the best advice I’ve ever gotten.

1. Know thyself.

Uttered by the famed sage Socrates as the definition of wisdom, knowing oneself is the key to why we are all here.  Life is a game in which you first figure out who you are, and then launch yourself into the equally daunting task of figuring out who you’re meant to be.   There is nothing to be gained in forcing yourself to be who you think you should be if you’re really not.  It seems like it would be an easy thing, but truth be told, there are some voices that are louder than our own, and tuning them out is not easy.

2. Good ideas are fleeting- start on them as soon as possible.

Paraphrased from the John C. Maxwell book in my bathroom, it bears notice that most good ideas never come to fruition simply because people never get around to following through on them.  It happened to da Vinci, it happened to Clinton, and it has happened to me.  If you have a great idea, take the first step immediately or plan a time to do it.  It may change your life, or someone else’s.

3. If it can be done in less than one minute, do it now.

This one is a real game changer when put into practice.  It is at least fifty percent of the literature available on time management.  This simple idea will revolutionize your home, organizational skills, relationships, finances—no kidding.  Try it.  It’s one of the best things I’ve EVER heard—I really can’t over-sell this one.

4. You can do anything for fifteen minutes/You can do anything fifteen minutes at a time.

Some people will not notice the difference between these two ideas.  The first one means that anything in this world that is not fatal can be tolerated for a set amount of time.  The second is more poignant.  Anything in this world can be broken up and managed in fifteen minute intervals.  You want to find the secret to anything you want in life?  Anything impossible or overwhelming is insultingly easy once broken into fifteen minute bites.

5.  Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.

This one is near and dear to my heart—as a perfectionist, I have actually sacrificed getting things done at all for the sake of doing them perfectly.  I have accomplished a fraction of what I deserve or could have achieved because of fear and timing—which is all perfectionism really is.  But I recognize that at this point in my life, bigger and bigger opportunities are slipping away because I am afraid of not pursing them the right way.  The fact is, in life, the only way to pursue anything is by laying it all out there—by not being afraid to look stupid and embracing the fact that you could completely fudge it all up.

These are the things that I’m keeping in mind as I launch into my 2012.  I am going to take chances, make changes, stop being perfect, fuck stuff up, be a little irresponsible, and basically, enjoy what it is to be twenty-two in New York City.  I’ve always loved the fact that people saw me as responsible—and I am.  I know that there’s only so far from that I will go.  But I want to start enjoying my life and stop trying to be everything to everyone.  I want to let my hair down and take chances, and most of all, stop giving a crap what everyone thinks of me.  And you know what?  I think that in doing so, I would actually be happier and ultimately more likeable.

So this year, I chase my own dreams, and my own happiness.  Even if I make a little mess along the way.

Photo courtesy of MusicThinkTank.com.

Blog… Dammit.

I have long suffered from perfectionism.  I realize more and more every day that as much as those perfectionist tendencies define and help me, they also limit me.  While I fully intend to go more deeply into this soon, I just want to declare openly here that come hell or high water, I will enter my book in the Amazon novel competition.  Dammit.

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.
~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

As humans, we have a tendency to act on emotions- to pursue happiness and satisfaction based on our fleeting day-to-day impulses. There is a huge difference, however, between needs and wants. At the beginning of the year, with its emphasis on introspection and self-development, we are much more in tune with what we need for our lives. That comes from much more than acceptance, but an active desire for change.

Change is necessary and healthy, but most of us resist it with a fervor and desperate excitement usually reserved for major sporting events and Black Friday specials. What we don’t realize, however, is that by resisting change we are fighting nature itself. Trees go through the endless cycle of the four seasons. Animals are born, live, mate, and die, sometimes all in the same day. Pilots are launched and canceled in their first season. Even the cells in our body never stabilize, but are constantly growing or dying.

I think it’s a powerful determination to take control of your life by understanding its innate transience, and resolving to choose the direction that your life will naturally develop in. You cannot stop change, but you can guide it and create the changes that you want to see the most in your own life.

Does that mean that unexpected or unwanted changes will never come? Absolutely not. But you will experience far greater growth, and when bumps do come up, you’ll be a person who can handle them.

If change is going to happen anyway, why not make it happen?

Photo courtesy of Self Personal.com.

New Year’s Day

It’s the New Year, and everyone has taken that beautiful, first refreshing breath of 2011. The New Year is a time to reinvent yourself!

In the spirit of doing something new and reinventing myself, here is a New Year’s haiku.

To everyone who made a resolution this year:

Lose baggage, not weight.
How you feel inside matters
More than how you look.